Wednesday, 19 December 2018

OLS Reflections 64 — The Dangerously Fun Ones




  • Tonight I will get inside a time machine, attempting to change the course of history. You will know I’ve succeeded if humans can speak Dolphinese and fluently communicate with cats and dogs, we got rid of silent letters and clothes hangers with non-rotating hooks, and there are no February 29. Oh, one last thing: “Teethbrush”.

  • Misplaced commas are utterly, egregious. Oh well, I should have remembered that punctuation jokes are never funny, period.

  • In a sincere effort to help their users get a life, as of December 1st Facebook will automatically change all relationship statuses from “It’s Complicated” to “It’s Time To Move On”.

  • Oftentimes I try to accomplish a certain task before the microwave hits ‘0’ like the fate of the entire human race depends on it. There is something thrilling about that countdown.

  • Which comes first: Recent Past or Current History?

  • Next time someone asks me to say something “in my own words”, I’ll look at them all seriously then say: “Tarabantini Parampal Hee Haw @—# Boop Thnoop. Halla Palo Paraclimidia, Todd?”

  • Whoever cooks rice and peas in the same pot is one filthy humanoid.

  • To find out the who the Head Nurse is look for the one with the constantly red knees.

  • The sex was so phenomenally wild last night, even the neighbours shared a smoke then took a shower afterwards. Today they woke up smiling yet still shy to look into each other’s eyes for too long.

  • I once took LSD in the clinic of a yellow submarine. There was no stethoscope or microscope, not even a periscope. But hey! It was all in kaleidoscope. So just by learning how to cope you end with the full scope. Pretty dope. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯



ALSO VIEW: 

OLS Reflections Sessantadue — The Scandalously Fun Ones

OLS Reflections 60 — The Sensationally Fun Ones

OLS Reflections 五十八 — The Shamelessly Fun Ones

OLS Reflections Fifty-Six — The Notoriously Fun Ones

OLS Reflections Dreiundfünfzig — The Playfully Fun Ones

OLS Reflections Cinquante-et-Un — The Corruptly Fun Ones
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