What’s the Story with Blue Balls (and Blue Vulva)?

Once while working in a hotel in my mid 20s, a reception girl passed out in the back area. I was the only one there and proceeded to carry her and put her on a chair. A colleague helped out before we called the hotel doctor to come check up on her. 



This was maybe an hour before the shift ends, and we agreed that she’ll leave then and I will take her home. Her house was pretty far, so by the time we got there it was already dark. Then, the girl passed out again right there on the seat next to mine.

It was a remote area where I parked the car. I then held her hand while calling her name, trying to gently wake her. At a certain moment I sensed that she might be faking it.

Still, the 22-year-old girl had long hair and legs and looked exceptionally seductive in that short uniform dress. The whole situation of me being her ‘boss’ and her being so vulnerable somehow turned me on — the high possibility that she could be faking it so that something would happen added a certain tabooistic-teenage excitement to the whole ordeal. But morally speaking, there wasn’t much for me to do. 



Eventually, the girl awoke and guided us to her house before saying goodnight and leaving. I did kiss her goodbye on the cheeks though. Then minutes later I began noticing some excruciating pain in my testicles like I have never felt before. I called a friend who’s five years older to tell him about about the adventure as well as the pain that followed. To which he confidently responded: “You need to jack off.

Really?



Now!

”

Hm. I did park the car and, being so up there, it didn’t take much to discharge. I remember that the pain didn’t go away right after. But it slowly kept receding until I got home about half an hour later.

Only then was I acquainted with the concept of blue balls. I mean, generally, it never felt good down there — or up there — when fooling around then not finishing. I’m certain that at least once in their lifetime, all men have experienced that agony caused by the sexual anticipation of foreplay followed by… a big fat nothing.

Usually, to be left hanging like that gets us guys frustrated and possibly even kind of angry at the “cock-teaser”. But it’s actually not their fault, you see. They are not required to finish you off, even though knowing about blue balls could make them inclined to be more empathetic and understanding towards the whole affair.

Yet, I had never really known it was a thing until that day. 

I still didn’t give it much attention. Having always been active — be it with others or alone — it wasn’t something that frequently occurred, hence there was nothing to worry about. Or so I thought.



This incident reminded me of a school boy who during our mid teens had once experienced extreme pain in his testicles. He consulted a doctor who told him that he needed to relieve himself. The guy was kind of religious and apparently thought that masturbation is a sin, so he never did it... until he got blue balls and was forced to. Ha.


As mentioned, since I constantly discharge I don’t remember having experienced serious, or any, pain again up until fast-forwarding to a few days ago. I was out at the Drum Circle when a seductive woman I know got totally pixilated and started physically flirting. Even though due to, once again, my moral fixation, I didn’t go all the way as I would have in normal circumstances, we still lightly played around, in public. We stayed maybe 45 minutes before we all left.



While heading home on the bike, I began feeling some pain building up around the scrotum area. A familiar sensation which at first I didn’t link to anything. But then after getting home the pain had already reached an uncomfortable level — throughout not just the balls but the entire lower abdomen. This was when I remembered blue balls and what happened 14 years earlier in the car.

Of course I did what I had to do. And again, the swelling pain took maybe 15 or 20 minutes afterwards to subside. Then the thought of writing this article to shed light on such mysterious biological phenomenon seemed like a neat idea. Whether you have no balls at all, are a horny teenage boy, or just curious about what blue balls are, one can safely assume that the following general knowledge would interest a wide variety of readers.


So what are blue balls?

When men are physically turned on, blood flows to the penis and testicles causing erection and swelling — from 25 to 50 percent increase in size. Once there is climax, everything goes back to its original dimensions. But if there is no climax after the stimulation, or they do not ‘finish’, the build-up of blood pressure, medically termed Vasocongestion, causes a temporary fluid congestion.

The fluids are produced in the testicles in order to propel sperm through the many tubes; when they have nowhere to go, the congestion causes swelling. This is physically translated as a dulling pain in the cojones. The pain actually feels like someone squeezing them. Aouch.

Epididymal Hypertension is the medical term for blue balls: “Testicular aching that occurs when the blood in the male’s genitals is retained after prolonged sexual arousal and is not dissipated by an orgasm”. Apparently, it does not occur to all males. Perhaps this is related to the different level of testosterone found in men.

Blue balls is not only the result of unfinished business, but it could also be caused by lack of sex, or ejaculation in general — just like our clogged schoolboy.



What is noteworthy is that without ejaculation, more stress, discomfort, and frustration are likely to complement the physical pain. A reason why some men exaggerate their blue balls situation, trying to make their women feel guilty about it.



Even though waiting or sleeping it off, even cold showers, may work in easing the temporary pain and swelling of blue balls, but if being excited got you to this point, then having an orgasm and just cumming may be the only natural, rational relief. Unless you’re some kind weirdo. Ha.

Let us remember that life is too short to spend it frustrated. It is healthy to have an orgasm or two every day. If you can’t find someone suitable to have it with, know that science has proven that masturbating provides plenty of healthy benefits, including stress relief. Now go fuck each other or yourselves and calm down. You do have my blessing.



Speaking of ejaculation, check The Intertwining of Music and Sexuality ― A Djembefola’s Tale where I am investigating the reason why mine seems to exponentially increase following drum sessions. 

The slang expression “blue balls” came to be used when a partner(s) teases a man and leaves him hanging or when a man hasn’t had sex in aeons — describing a state of sexual frustration. ‘Blue’ is punnily suitable as it also means ‘sad’ or ‘depressed’, which could work when the male is trying to make the partner(s) feel sorry for him and get him off. But as mentioned, the phenomenon is scientifically recognised and ‘blue’ in the nomenclature is not just a random colour. 



Epididymal Hypertension is colloquially termed “blue balls”; because it is held that the scrotum area may turn a bluish hue from the accumulation of de-oxigenated blood in the testicles. Oxygen-rich blood on the surface of the skin creates a reddish colour, while blood with little oxygen appears blue. Without “uncloging the pipe”, the blood stays in the testicles and scrotum without circulating to the heart and lungs. This decreases the oxygen level which causes the blueness of the skin.

Speaking of, some people’s faces tend to give that same blueish hue after being addicted to heroin for a long time. Back then, I never made the connection with lack of oxygen, yet several people mentioned they would notice this phenomenon on certain faces — as I did. That is, in addition to the original pale white colour usually prevalent among drug abusers. When, conversely, one would get clean, there is indeed a healthy and vibrant reddish hue that seems to replace the blue, or at least the pale white, while lightening up the face.

This colouration change, however, remains different than the infamous blueish purple overdose face, or the pale grey/ashy for those with darker skin tones.

Interestingly, Ladies and Gentlemen, the condition can also affect females. And it is colloquially called “Blue Vulva”. Seriously.

The medical term is “Pelvic Congestion” and it is caused when women are sexually aroused while the vulva, uterus, and ovaries swell with blood. This causes a similar feeling of the heaviness and aching of blue balls, apparently. Just like men, the discomfort dissipates once orgasm is reached, or after some time has elapsed. But if there is no relief, then they become frustrated and blue vulva it is. Fair and square.

This conveniently reminds me of Femme mal baisée, which is a French term describing a frustrated, intolerable, and unsatisfied woman. According to the expression, the reason why those women become unable to be loving is that they never got their healthy dose of sex.
 

Note that pelvic congestion is different from “Pelvic Congestive Syndrome”, which according this Article is a condition where enlarged varicose veins cause chronic aching in the pelvic region. The pain or discomfort one experiences from (PCS) cannot simply be relieved through orgasm. Bur rather, it is often treated through a procedure called embolization.



Intriguingly, there is not much medical research when it comes to blue balls — or blue vulva. Perhaps because it is a temporary, non-contagious, and non-life-threatening condition, it is not taken seriously by the scientific community. Perhaps also because it doesn’t require therapy, drugs, or any money-making; but the solution simply lies in sexual release.

Such unpopularity makes some people, probably most of them women, think that blue balls is just a myth. Others regard it as an excuse by men to get frisky; or even worse, that the men are just being “big babies” about it. But I’m telling you it is indeed real, and the pain is not fun at all. 


On a parallel note, an additional information I learned recently is that one testicle is often slightly larger than the other. This is usually normal and nothing to worry about. However, if you notice that one testicle has enlarged you should ask your doctor to check it. Generally, the right testicle is larger than the left. Also, one testicle (usually the left) often hangs lower than the other.

Likewise, 65 percent of women have the left breast larger than the right, which is the same percentage of men having a left testis hanging lower than the right. 

Now you know what blue balls is, what causes it, and how to treat it. Perhaps now you can be more empathetic towards yourself and your partners... males or females.

ALSO VIEW: 

Arugula: The Healthy Ancient Aphrodisiac

The Intertwining of Music and Sexuality ― A Djembefola’s Tale

Kicking That Sweet Habit

 

Why I Choose to Remain a Non-Dad for Now — Reflections on Being Childless

When Selective Men Reject Women

The Art of Approaching Women

Codependency: What Being Addicted to Someone Means

Personal Questions I’m Often Asked and Their Answers

Things I Miss From Being in a Relationship

Who Are We?

My Journey Towards Self-Transcendence

How I Dropped Two Waist Sizes in a Few Months

 

The Egyptian Man Who Kept a Piece of Hash in His Stomach for Four Years

I was one day chatting with a sweet muse who told me that her friend’s dad, a surgeon, had just extracted a big piece of hashish from a patient’s guts after laying there for four long years. Since she kindly sent me those couple of photos, I thought it’s an interesting, and certainly weird happening to write about. Funnily, swallowing hash was the topic of my very first article on One Lucky Soul here, When The Puppies Ate The “Chocolate” from 2011, only that it involved dogs not humans. So the story seems right up my alley. Here it is.


A few years ago, a man who lives in Alexandria, Egypt had some trouble with the law and was sentenced to prison after a case related to constructions. Once in, he was gifted a piece of hash ― judging from the photos it looks like it’s a “two-coin” or “two-finger” piece, roughly 9 grams that cost EGP 600-800*, or US$ 120 around the year 2012. It is not known if the gift came from inside the prison or outside it.

When at some point the prison guards were inspecting the cells, searching for illegal stuff, the man had no other option but to swallow the hash to avoid being in trouble...big trouble. As he swallowed the piece he thought it would be a temporary matter; either he will puke it at some point or it will go down with his poop a few days later. However, the piece of hash never came out and the man remained in prison until completing the rest of his sentence.

Only four years later, the now-free man had started to get abdominal pains. He went to the doctor who did an x-ray and found a “foreign body” inside. The man then told the doctor about the hash story from back then. So, they opened him up and got the piece out ... intact.

This is the astounding part which shows how the human body is really a wondrous work of art with a mind of its own: Because the stomach could not digest the hash, due, I think, to the fact that it is wrapped in plastic and to its size, it has miraculously developed a sort of isolator to engulf the foreign object without obstructing any of the functions of the stomach, or of the entire body. This new organic setting allowed the hash to remain in the body for almost 1500 days while the man, apparently, had no physical problems whatsoever.

When I first heard the story I didn’t understand how the hash didn’t decompose for all these years. Hash is known to be edible and it does get you high when you eat it. However, it has to be chewed and broken down. The man here just swallowed the package, which the body dealt with as a “foreign” object that does not belong to the equation and isolated it from the rest of itself to avoid any health hazards. How cool is that. 

I guess this story gives “Pot belly” a whole new meaning. Do you see how your body loves you and why you should love it back?


On a parallel note, and other than When The Puppies Ate The “Chocolate”, also check the Arabic article ( احذروا التقليد عند الشراء — ظاهرة الحشيش المخلوط في مصر ) about adulterated hashish sold in Egypt among other countries in the region with added Parkinol (Trihexyphenidyl) as I happened to find out. This is a cheap and wicked anticholinergic, antiparkinson agent of the antimuscarinic class and a medication that cause hallucinations and delirium.

Wonder if the hash got stronger, weaker, or hasn’t changed in terms of potency,
also wondering what will happen to the piece now. Medical museum?

*EDIT (2018): While the price of a two-finger piece may have been around 600-800 EGP in Egypt at the time the action occurred ― with 1 US$ = 6 EGP as exchange rate ― starting 2017-2018 it increased even more to reach 1200-1600 EGP, or US$ 75 ― with 1 US$ = 17 EGP!



ALSO VIEW:

Funny Drug-Related Stories

Funny Drug-Related Stories 2
 
Surviving the Madness of Sakarana — Hyoscyamus muticus

Opiated Then Hatin' It

Addiction Talk: My Correspondence With a 31-Year-Old Reader Before He Passed Away

The LSD Experiments of the 1950s and 60s [Videos & Documentaries]

Out-of-Body Experience and Ego Death on a “Heroic Dose” of Mushrooms  

Amphetamine, Methamphetamine, and Crystal Methamphetamine — A Psychonaut’s Review

Placebo Effect & The LSD Prank 

Funny Hotel-Related Stories

When The Puppies Ate The “Chocolate”

احذروا التقليد عند الشراء — ظاهرة الحشيش المخلوط في مصر

 

Why Japanese Females Have Bowlegs

Have you ever noticed how a large number of young Asian women — and some men — tend to have crooked lower legs that curve outward? Well, you’re not the first to inquire about such peculiarity. People are actually asking this same question all over the Internet. 
And this is what I found.

Bowlegs is a condition in which the knees stay wide apart when a person stands with their feet and ankles together. Certain cases are more extreme than others, normally forcing the person to walk in a somewhat strange way.

Medically speaking, Bow-leggedness is called Genu Varum. Also known as Bandiness, Bandy-leg, and Tibia Vara, it is a physical deformity marked by outward bowing of the lower leg in relation to the thigh, giving the appearance of an archer’s bow. Usually a medial angulation of both femur — the thigh bone — and the tibia — the larger of the two leg bones located below the knee cap — is involved.

Due to the folded position in their mother’s womb, being mildly bowlegged is considered normal in infants below 18-months old. As the child starts to walk and the legs begin to bear weight, the legs are typically straightened, resolving the issue without any type of bracing or treatment.

However, the condition may persist if the child is in poor health; mainly if sick with rickets (bone disorder caused by vitamin D deficiency) or suffering from any ailment which prevents the due ossification of the bones, or is improperly fed. Once older than three and a half years old and the legs and still notably crooked, then treatment is advised.


But why Japan? Well, bow-leggedness

 is particularly widespread in Japan where it is believed that a staggering 90% of women are bowlegged. According to a Japanese folklorist, Kunio Yanagida, in Japanese culture the crooked legs were once “known as beautiful woman’s attraction”, seen as cute and endearing. A similar idea lies behind China’s foot binding — a cultural symbol of femininity.

On a parallel yet more sensual note, check Why Some Women Point Their Feet When Aroused on this other article. 

Is it still considered attractive?

It is believed that the origin of bow-leggedness may have stemmed from the days of wearing kimonos. Since it’s easier to walk in them if you turn the toes slightly inward. “That also produces what has long been considered a graceful, attractive gait.”

According to other popular theories, bowlegs could result from how girls sit on the floor as children; either with both legs bent outwards at the knees (called Onnanoko-zuwari in Japanese) or seiza, which is sitting on the heels with bent knees. Though for now, these ideas remain but theories.

The condition is equally common in some other Asian countries, but perhaps not as widespread as in Japan. This confirms how frequently I have seen this phenomenon, mainly in the streets and subways of Canada and the U.S.

The legs of the young woman you see in the above video are referred to as “X legs”. It is when the knees are naturally inverted, causing the person to walk like a duck. One Japanese blogger shared: “They look like they need to pee”. Badly, it seems. Or they are about to take a group photos with their besties. However, the much more common in Asians, as well as in general, are the “O legs,” which are also arched but not as drastically. 

Correction of leg curvature

Fortunately, bowlegs can be treated in children and in adults. Anthropometric cosmetology is the medical practice science of correction and modification of deformities in the upper and lower extremities of the body. It is used to fix the X-shaped curvature of the legs as well as the O-shaped curvature. It can also be used in cases of relative shortening of the legs relative to body length.

Anthropometric cosmetology is done either to attain an aesthetically pleasing appearance or to eliminate physical and psychological discomforts. Though the severe cases of bow-leggedness can worsen quickly if not treated early enough. Treatment for children is typically braces, but also surgery may be necessary, especially for teens. The operation consists of taking a piece of tibia out, breaking the fibula, and straightening out the bone. There is also the option of slightly elongating the legs.


There are apparently other less professional ways to fix the ‘X’ and the ‘O’ shapes in legs. One of those natural treatments are the Japanese Ashi-yubi “Shiikuretto Ringu” (Toe secret ring) seen in the image below. Wearing this ring is supposed to help center the weight of the body. Because if you have bowlegs or your pelvis is distorted, your balance is spread outside. So the rings not only fixes the posture and straighten the legs, but allegedly it can also make one lose weight.

Ashi-yubi “Shiikuretto Ringu” (Toe secret ring)

Another advertised treatment for O legs / X legs is a straightening correction band sold online for $22.


Even though treatments for bowlegs are available, many people choose not to do it because they could be costly. However, in extreme cases like in the featured video, walking this way for years damages the pelvis bone among other things. Due to uneven stress and wear on the knees, it usually leads to more complications, such as accelerated onset of arthritis. As a matter of fact, those with bowlegs and a genetic predisposition for developing arthritis will likely start having arthritic symptoms around the age of 30.


One related condition to bowleggedness is Genu valgum, commonly called “Knock-Knees”. And it is when the knees angle in and touch one another when the legs are straightened. It is the opposite of bow-leggedness, one could say. Beginning around two years of age it is common to see children’s legs become knock-kneed.

Both bowed legs and knock-knees are a part of normal development. As the child grows, the legs gradually straighten. Usually by 10 years of age, the legs are straight.

An additional related feet condition is the Pigeon toe — also known as Metatarsus varus, Metatarsus adductus, In-toe gait, Intoeing or False Clubfoot — which causes the toes to point inward when walking. It is most common in infants and children under two years of age. Though in my case, Pigeon toes remained through the mid-teens. After years of wearing, I recall how the Nike sneakers looked like the Tower of Pisa, especially whenever off. 

I actually think the girl in the same video may be bowlegged AND pigeon-toed. That’s like having dyslexia and being crossed-eyed. Sorry, just couldn't help it.


Oh well, now you know a few things about legs... and Japanese schoolgirls.

ALSO VIEW:

The Comfort Women of the Imperial Japanese Army

Why Some Women Point Their Feet When Aroused

What’s the Story with Blue Balls (and Blue Vulva)?

Arugula: The Healthy Ancient Aphrodisiac

Kicking That Sweet Habit: Why and How to Drop Sugar

Why Japanese Females Have Bowlegs

What’s the Story with Blue Balls (and Blue Vulva)?

Arugula: The Healthy Ancient Aphrodisiac

 

Not Sleeping With a French Hooker at 14

 
The Night I Became a Stripper in Spain

When Selective Men Reject Women

 
The Intertwining of Music and Sexuality ― A Djembefola’s Tale

Why Hippies Are Sometimes Called Bohemians

Why the “No-Smoking” Sign is Still Used by Airline Companies

Why Americans Don’t Travel Much

Why NOT a Bidet?

Why Many Place Names End with ‘-Stan’

Why Flamingos Are Pinkish-Orange

Why Thanksgiving Dinner Is Served So Early

Kicking That Sweet Habit: Why and How to Drop Sugar

 

Why I Choose to Remain a Non-Dad for Now — Reflections on Being Childless

How I Dropped Two Waist Sizes in a Few Months

Things I Miss From Being in a Relationship

How I Dropped Two Waist Sizes in a Few Months