Friday, 28 November 2014

On Love and Attachment




Confusing attachment with love is quite a common mistake. There is a fine line between both, yet one could argue that they are complete opposites. The following is a brief explanation of the difference between the two.


Love in its true sense is all-inclusive. It
is selfless, accepting, and it’s about appreciation. True love is unconditional. And unconditional love is not really with anything or anybody in particular, but it’s with Everything and Everybody. It is directed outwards. Love is neither personal nor impersonal; it is given out without expectation. Love is an expression of the Higher Self, thus it is pure.

On the other hand, attachment is exclusive. It is limiting; it breeds fear, pain of loss, and a sense of possession, which normally leads to dependence, expectations, and boundaries. Attachment is about control. It’s about binding oneself to someone, or something; identifying with them — forgetting your own individuality in the process. Attachment is an expression of the ego, thus it brings upon foolish traits such as jealousy, pride, and envy.


The Significance of Letting Go is another piece where I discuss attachment in details and how to overcome it. Because, “Let go or be dragged.”



N
ow, let us say you see a beautiful flower in a garden nearby your house. Love means you want the flower to grow and blossom and be in the best possible shape and form, because that is the initial reason why you love and appreciate it. So, you leave your home everyday to walk to the garden and water the flower. You keep an eye on it and shower it with care and attention so its beauty remains. You exert an effort.

Attachment means selfishly picking the flower to put it in a vase at home, so that only you can enjoy it. It is about wanting to control things and raking away their freedom. But there is no real will to exert much effort here. You see the difference?
 
 
As such,
once the distinction between love and attachment is made clear, you’ll see that it is rather natural to admire without desire; to find some people attractive without actually ‘liking’ or “falling in love” with them. The appeal can very well be only for the eyes, and it doesn’t have to be for the mind or heart as well.

 
Unlike attachment, love transcends the physical separation, therefore it is of spiritual essence. Attachment is a condition which can turn into a disorder, while Love is a state of being, a mindset which can turn your life around.



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