The Significance of Letting Go

Whether it’s a hateful happening, a dead-end job, a toxic relationship or a lifeless life, every painful experience we have endured has helped form the person we are today. 
Initially, most psychological issues and complexes adults suffer from stem from things which had happened to them in their past as children or teenagers. Whatever it was, accepting those experiences, learning from them, even cherishing some of them, is the way to get past them.

Once these few steps are achieved, it’s time to let go. Let go of the victim mentality; of all the self-generated, unwanted thoughts about that which had happened — or whatever else you may consider ‘negative’. Not by fighting them, but rather by observing. By doing so, we instantly separate ourselves from the thoughts, and snap out of it by cultivating more positive ones and insist on doing so. If we don’t, the negative will start to remanifest itself in our minds and has the potential of getting worse. As the Zen proverb reminds us: “Let go or be dragged.”


To be able to grow to our Higher Self ― as opposed to our ego self ― throughout this mystical journey called Life and reach the Light, letting go becomes an essential part. We let go of all that is not us; all that weighs us down like conditioning, attachments, expectations, prejudices, judgments, stereotypes, and emotional fixations ― the things which stopped serving the growth and evolution of our soul.




If we really want to spread our wings and fly high, we must drop those crippling burdens overboard. The heaviest part of us is our ego ― always asking us to be someone or something, never sacrificing itself. This dead weight makes our excursion through life much slower, as it makes us less mobile. But there is no moving forward as long as we’re clinging to the past, or to our ego. And certainly, there is no freedom. 

People get attached to a wide variety of things. It could be a lost dream, a hope, a substance, a lifestyle, a thought pattern, a relationship, or a person. Essentially, all kinds of attachments drain us. Thus we have no energy left for the ‘positive’, or for any novelty. They make it hard to embrace new things because the mind is filled with the ‘negative’, so there is neither energy nor space for the otherness. To travel light throughout our journey, throwing those burdens away becomes an existential choice.


One earlier article about our attachment to others is Codependency: What Being Addicted to Someone Means. The Parable of the Cow: You Are Not Your Thoughts is another more philosophical one, discussing our attachment to thoughts in particular and the process of letting go of them.

Metamorphosis

We only grow when we let go. The reality is, some are stuck in the phase between the caterpillar and the butterfly — or moth. They are no longer the first; yet because they fear the unknown while resisting change, they are not open to the chance of becoming the latter. Potentially, they may waste their entire lives stuck in an eternal “in-waiting” rut, a limbo status. 

 

To fully become who you essentially are at the core is to spread your wings fearlessly and trust that Life will lift you up towards unfathomable heights. You see, taking a bold leap into the unknown means you will either land on a feathered bed or you will learn to fly.

Follow your dreams to where they may lead you. No matter how crazy or seemingly impossible they appear — to you or the world. Yet, be open to the possibility that the road, even the destination, may likely be different than what you had imagined. Then it matters not what actually transpires. For the journey becomes the destination. This is what leading a free and full life is about: Acknowledging the risks of seeking to materialise your dreams, courageously embracing the uncertainty rather than fearing it, and confidently going for the jump anyway.

“Let go or be dragged,” remember. Now fly away.

The truth is, the hardship we experience makes us stronger. It is actually a healthy human experience. For the pain and suffering add us with a new, and usually deeper perspective on life, as well as on our overall existence. It is how we grow through life; how we become. However, when the lesson is learned, it’s time to move on. Much like overthinking the future, dwelling on the past ― or on a specific incident ― never helps. Letting go, on the other hand, does.

Remember, how much weight we give each thought is our choice and our choice alone. This is how we become in control of our state of mind. It goes to the extent of persisting in the positive so intensely that letting go of any depressing or unkind thoughts that may arise comes naturally, without thinking about it. They are simply filtered out, almost unconsciously. 
This is why letting go means letting go of suffering. This is how we mature and grow thicker skin; how we set ourselves free. 


It is worth noting that letting go can only be achieved following getting to the root of the problem — this Aha-Moment. Medications, drugs and alcohol, even time may numb you for a while, but they will not completely heal you. Those are temporary getaways.

To Forgive Is Not To Reconcile is one more article of mine discussing what Buddhism and Psychoanalysis say about letting go when it comes to forgiveness and reconciliation.


One thing remains certain, there is no healing without letting go. We when let go, we grow. Because with letting go come novelty and rejuvenation. 

This self-mastery and self-conquest introduce us to our true Higher Selves. This is the secret of the art of living; the secret to a happy and simple life, which, with practice, anyone is able to reach. Simply, because happiness and peace of mind rely solely on what we think — or not think. They rely on our very own mental state and not on outside factors.

Peace of mind does not mean that life around us is rosy. But rather, we find happiness and inner peace amidst the storm. We surround ourselves with what we love and let go of what does not serve us. The less baggage we carry, the simpler life becomes. The process is an inside job in its purest form. For The Kingdom of Heaven is truly within us, my Dear Ones.  


“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”
― Steve Maraboli

*Article first published on Conscious Life News.


ALSO VIEW:

Things I Got Rid Of To Become Happier

Letting Go of Getting Offended and Taking Things Personally

Codependency: What Being Addicted to Someone Means

Dealing with High Awareness and Empathic Accuracy

What Is Fear of Abandonment and How to Overcome It

What Is Overcompensation?

What Being Conscious Means

My Journey Towards Self-Transcendence

To Forgive Is Not To Reconcile

The Parable of the Cow: You Are Not Your Thoughts