Wednesday, 15 April 2020

Paycheque Addiction and COVID-19

Destination Addiction

T had been working for the same prestigious company since she graduated from university. She may have actually started just a month afterwards and remained with them until she was in her early 50s. What happened then was that she was offered an early retirement. Someone could have taken this opportunity to enjoy the rest of their life while they are still able to. But not T. The woman was shattered. She couldn’t handle being free; not being told what to do. Simply because she was never used to it. Strict parents in the early 1960s, school, university, then work followed. She never had time for herself, and when life happened she didn’t take it too well.

Plans of travelling the world, starting Yoga classes, learning a new hobby or skill, or even chillaxing on the beach seemed not enough for the woman. 30 long years of a desk job can indeed do this to you. You obviously miss out on life as you trade it for some papers called money. Year after year, you get hooked on that paycheque, become its slave, and start spending more and more on stuff you don’t need, which end up owning you, certainly slowing you down. But fortunately for her, money is no issue for T as she is well-established, one could say. 

Naturally, T doesn’t know how to cook, has quite the poor social skills, and is emotionally immature. Apart from her husband and parents, she has no friends — and never spoke of any.

The current COVID-19 pandemic, it seems, is revealing lots of different versions of T. Quarantined folks feeling stuck at home instead of being grateful they don’t have to go to work, including many soul-sucking jobs they solely do for the money. Heck, some are even protesting against the break as well as against wearing masks! While it may be safe to note that no one likes to be forced to do something, ironically, most are initially somewhat forced to work; whether to bring food to the table, impress their family, please their spouses, or to become someone in the society.

The reality is, now they are actually safe at home, owning their hours, perhaps for the first time in years. Many are in fact still getting payed. If I were them, I’d actually be ecstatic and learn how to enjoy the slow pace; how to master the art of living my own life — on my own terms, my own drum tunes. So it is precisely how you look at it that matters at the end.

Those from my generation have been working for roughly 20 years, so they aren’t that far off from T. It became their routine system as they lead somewhat automatic existences, in which they rarely ever pause or reflect. Not even face themselves, get to know it on a deeper, less superficial level. Because they have no time to do so. 

Without solitude and introspection the distractions of life with all its drama win by default.

This brings us to Destination Addiction. As a topic discussed in a full sub-chapter in my book, destination addiction is the obsession with the idea that the future holds the promise for our happiness or fulfilment. Either in the next place, the next job, the next lottery ticket, the next big break, with the next partner, or in the next life. Most people have a subconscious tendency to believe that the next moment will be better than the current one. That is to say, they feel they need to leave where they are to reach where they want to be. “Chasing the Rainbow” is a lethal mindset to adopt. Besides, if you somehow ever reach the pot of gold you will likely be too old to enjoy it. 

That said, many forget that our time here is limited — a mere 100 years at most. The truth remains, however: Happiness or fulfilment or whatever else you may be seeking can never be found if you’re only expecting to find it in the next time or place. Not unexpectedly, if we’re always dismissing the Here and Now and postponing that which we’re looking for to the next moment or destination, we’ll never reach it. The present moment is all we got. Living it fully and madly is how we reach our full potential while creating our own reality. It was humans, you see, who made time up as a construct, and it is no commodity.

Are You Addicted To The News? is an article about another kind of addiction touching the lives of millions of people yet nobody talks about it. These days it may be useful to come to terms with the fact that not all you hear or read in the media is factually true. 

Coming from someone who worked in shifts six times a week for six straight years, I remember well. No wonder I eventually had to get sedated in my free time. To gain some kind of control over my life; to “do what I want”. This eventually evolved into yet another kind of addiction involving a substance. Four more years of a slightly less hectic schedule followed. Yet, the lack of passion and fulfilment were still there. Then it was time to leave it all behind, travel far and away and get clean. The Rebirth. The Healing. The Becoming. The Renaissance. Taking arts in general and writing in particular as vocations then came to the rescue, helping me awaken to my true nature. Ever since and I work from home. So, luckily, the isolation, the comforting “me-time”, and not leaving the house for days at times come naturally here. In actual fact, my life has barely changed since the beginning of the pandemic. 

The best suggestion about what to do during this COVID-19 lockdown is to use the seclusion, free time, and unshackled, unobstructed energy to create and to learn. See, some people get bored, others get creative. This is how I began writing and taking photos — simply doing that which I love, and hence that which I can be good at. You can’t go wrong there, really. So get creative while you can or read books that you actually do finish. Research topics that captivate YOU, for almost anything and everything becomes interesting once we dig deep enough. Learn about yourself while taking this compulsory break from the rat race.

Speaking of, do you think rats who feel stuck in a routine self-defeating life blame it on the “Human Race”?


Are You Addicted To The News?

Dear Single Parents

Why I Choose to Remain a Non-Dad for Now — Reflections on Being Childless

What Nomad Lions Can Teach Us About Growing Through Life

The Parents Dilemma

Do Parents Know Best When it Comes to Our Life Choices?

When Choosy Men Reject Women

Different Shades of Passion

Debunking Myths We Were Exposed To While Growing Up

Who Are We?

Dealing with High Awareness and Empathic Accuracy

Change Is The Only Constant

Unfollow the Crowd

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