Thursday, 20 December 2012

Silliest Inventions of the 20th Century

Human imagination can usually go far and wide, but some inventions can also be quite
unnecessary. Check out the following hilarious collection...

Curved Barrel Machine Gun, 1953 

Take our first example here, this M3 sub-machine gun with a curved barrel for shooting around
corners. It's the perfect gun for your average "shoot first, look later" kind of guy. 

Anti-Bandit Bag, 1963 

Inventor John H T Rinfret demonstrates his anti-bandit bag. To fool the bandits, the chain is
pulled and the bottom of the case falls out so the content is scattered over the floor.
That'll stop those muggers from getting at what's in the bag! No wait, it won't.

Hubbard Electrometer, 1968 

American science fiction writer and founder of the Church of Scientology L. Ron Hubbard uses
his Hubbard Electrometer to determine whether tomatoes experience pain. His work led him to
the conclusion that tomatoes "scream when sliced". I seriously cannot Ketchup with those guys.

Cup Bras, 1949 

Charles L. Langs poses with his strapless, backless, wireless, support-less bras. His wife doesn't
look too supportive though; she seems unenthusiastic. 

Finnish Portable Sauna, 1962

I'd finish with the Finnish.

Baby Cage, 1937 

A nanny supervising a baby suspended in a wire cage attached to the outside of a high tenement block window. The cages were distributed to members of the Chelsea Baby Club in London who have no gardens, or qualms about putting a child in a box dangling over a busy street. Genius.

Laryngaphone, 1929 

A man at a shipping exhibition in Olympia, London, demonstrating the ''Laryngaphone,'' a noise-excluding telephone which only transmits vibrations from the vocal chords when the microphone is placed against the throat or cheek. Where are those today when we need them the most?

Motorized Surfboard, 1948 

Hollywood inventor Joe Gilpin riding his motorized surfboard. Yey! Lots of fun. Just like a water Segway.

Rainy Day Cigarette Holder, 1954 

President of Zeus Corp., Robert L. Stern, smoking a cigarette from his self-designed rainy day cigarette holder. Bwilliance in a puff. He must had been living in Cilaos, Réunion.

Rocket Belt, 1961 

Engineer Harold Graham salutes President Kennedy after demonstrating Rocket Belt for him. Jet-pack!

Honegar, 1959 

Inventor of a honey and vinegar mixture, called Honegar, Dr. DeForest C. Jarvis. Honegar was said to be a folk remedy for aches and pains. Though honey AND vinegar are already good for pretty much everything.

Illuminated Tires, 1961 

A woman adjusts her stocking by the light of the Goodyear's illuminated tires. The tire is made from a single piece of synthetic rubber and is brightly lit by bulbs mounted inside the wheel rim. I guess those could look cool but probably the functionality was dimwitted.

Shower Hood, 1970 

For the woman who likes to put makeup on her dirty face. Or for a bee lover.

Cigarette Pack Holder, 1955 

Yep. Let me play you the music of my people.

Handwriting Game, 1955 

A handwriting game being analyzed by members of the Ideal Toy panel on Inventor's Day at the Ideal Toy Company in Hollis, New York. Because there's nothing children love more than handwriting games. 

 Fast-Draw Robot, 1960 

Robot equipped with fast-draw invention shoots it out with live gunner. It's always easy to question the wisdom of giving a robot a gun, but also making him quick on the draw is just lovely. How unsilly and original. 

Yodel Meter, 1925 

Two girls try out the new yodel meter, which measures the pitch of the human yodel. Yodelayheehoo.

 Mini Television, 1966 

British inventor Clive Sinclair shows off his mini television. Noting the thickness of Tintin's glasses, it's really all a matter of perspective. Well, people today do watch videos on their phones.

Flying Platform, 1956 

Flying platforms being tested at an Air Force base. Jet-pack!

Beating Breasts, 1963 

A pair of artificial breasts with a built-in heartbeat. An invention from — where else? — Japan intended as a sleeping aid for very young children. For teenage boys and adult males as well, I'm sure.

Venetian Blind Sunglasses, 1950 

An example of a pre-psychedelic era invention @#$%^&* Bang Bing !@#Ayee

Birdman Suit, 1955 

Birdman Leo Valentin demonstrates his method of flying from a special harness. Valentin died when his invention failed him after jumping out of an airplane in 1956. R.I.P, Birdie NumNum. You're always flying now.

 Phone-Answering Robot, 1964 

A robot designed by Claus Scholz of Vienna answers the phone, though it cannot speak. Halfway there, Claus. Answer machine level: -17.

Baby Holder, 1937 

Jack Milford, player with the Wembley Monarchs ice hockey team, has invented a carrying device so that his baby can join his wife and himself on the ice. Because babies deserve it, that's why. 

Sea-Shoes, 1962 

Inventor M W Hulton demonstrates his sea-shoes and duckfoot propellers on the Grand Union Canal, England. These guys had a serious misunderstanding of what water fun really is.

T.V. Glasses, 1963 

Inventor Hugo Gernsback with his T.V. Glasses. His youngest son works for Google now. Wink.

Cat-Mew Machine, 1963 

This mechanical cat can meow ten times a minute and the eyes light up each time. The device for scaring rats and mice is from Japan and is powered by a two-watt motor. It's always them and cats, huh.

Dog Restrainer, 1940 

Pizza Dog?

Cigarette Holder Built For Two, 1955

Gotta love the holding hand bit and the cheeky looks.

External Turkey Roaster, 1966

That "Right before the concert" shot. Jet-pack!

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