When you know someone’s essence and they know yours, spending some quality time together can be the best of therapy. Even if you haven’t met in many years, something about the bonding never changes. Other things evolve as you both grow and mature through life.
A couple of Saturdays ago, I met up with a long-time relative and Brotherman along with his dog Bruno. When they first came into my place, the dog seemed a little unnerved. A moment later, my bud heard some popping noise coming from the fire alarm. He asked if I could hear it, to which I said no, before proceeding to tell him about my Tinnitus.
Apparently, there was a sound due to the battery losing power. I believe it’s how it alarms you that it needs to be replaced. A minute through and I heard that popping sound and instantly recognised it. It was a refreshing Aha-relief-moment.
Well, I began hearing the sound about a couple of weeks ago. But I could only hear it sometimes. Gullibly, I linked it to my Tinnitus and assumed that this may be the next step; as I also assumed that it’s probably due to drumming. But it wasn’t.
We disconnected the alarm and talked about Tinnitus for a bit. Being old-school psychonauts, the conversation lead us to discussing reality, The Middle Way, life, among various other interesting topics which took us on an explorative ride throughout the whole evening. I happily skipped the Drum Circle that day.
“You’re saying that you have constant bird chirping sounds, but this popping sound was different. Didn’t that make you think that it’s something outside of you?” he asked.
“Well to be honest, now the lines between what is internal and what is external to me are more blurred. I don’t fully trust my senses or sanity as I don’t fully trust my madness. As such, living alone — and in my head — for all these years makes me live in my own reality without much interruption. We all do create our own reality, but most people get to mingle with others’ realities on daily basis, which isn’t the case for some of us who lead more solitary lives.
So, if you haven’t been here today, I would have probably continued to believe that this was my deteriorating Tinnitus, until maybe the battery dies; I would then believe that I have been ‘healed’. Or I leave where I am and go live somewhere else where there is no popping sound, which again will likely make me think that it’s gone from MY ears.”
This,” I resumed, “is how connecting with others and sharing realities is beneficial.”
Between walking around on Abbot Kinney with the cute dog and chilling at my place, our engaging discussion took us further into deeper topics. He is the only one out of my six or seven close friends who isn’t married and doesn’t have kids, so the similarity between where we both are today in our lives made us bond even more.
I remember at some point sharing Rumi’s “You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop” then went along to tell him why this is a gem of truth...
Now, once you see yourself as insignificant with a poor-little-me mindset, you will likely spend your entire life believing and living as such: Just a drop. But, on the other hand, if you realize you are connected to the whole, therefore you are the ocean — the entire Youniverse — you will accordingly live a grand cosmic life. It all lies in our perception, which in turn, stems from our conception of the world we’re living in. Realising the significance of our insignificance is the key.
Moving on to life, he then asked me if I ever thought of buying a camper. I paused for a second, before remembering that this had always been a childhood dream — to get a motorhome (North American RV), give its interior a kool makeover, and travel the entire world. For now, though, the U.S would do.
If I am happy with a minimal life, then I might as well take the minimalism along and be able to move around. You are mobile and you can go anywhere and always have your home with you. How convenient. A Facebook friend actually just did this, and she seems happy.
The camper idea made my eyes brighten up and took my mind for a ride.
We ended the night with a final walk with Bruno and agreed to meet again at some point. For those of us who rarely socialise, meetings like these can truly be therapeutic. I woke up the next day feeling rejuvenated and we did hang out the following week.
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